How's my essay?

i'm applying for a youth advisory council and one of the requirements is to write an essay on traits that i have that's been the biggest asset to me in leadership situations. i know i may have some errors, so i'd really appreciate if you give me your feedback on it. thak a tn!

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appeal to ethos is your answer.

c is a symbol. when bernice gets her hair cut, it is the authors way of showing the affects and demands of pier pressure and the over-all attitudes of people at the time.

michael’s company should invest in the updating of every section as well as data and processes technology and software. through the analysis of the manufacturing process, the company can take a clear approach towards the best way to improve not only the process but also de final result. some of the main problems that manufacturing companies face are the waste of material due to disorganized processes and the lack of real-time process checkings. this can be solved with specific software and machines that can turn paperwork into the digital era and that will reduce the time employees take on that, being this time better apply to control the production process and communication among different sectors of the company, the product will be made in shorter time with better quality and more profit