English, 31.03.2021 23:50, Averybeam300
I like the first paragraph. But look at my second one. It has no pizzazz, and it doesn't state my ideas very clearly. The last sentence, especially, packs in a lot of information that doesn't flow very well. I think I can make clearer by emphasizing the words "bureaucracy" and "way behind." Help me out: rewrite the paragraph using repetition to emphasize these words.
Help me out: rewrite the paragraph using repetition to emphasize these words.
Rewrite the second paragraph using repetition to emphasize the words "bureaucracy" and "way behind."
This is the paragraph: You might think that cell phone technology was invented only a few years ago. But believe it or not, the idea behind cell phones has been around since 1947. The problem was, as is often the case, that the technology was way behind the idea. And the technology was way behind because government bureaucracy deliberately held it behind. Bureaucracy hindered the development of this handy device.
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I like the first paragraph. But look at my second one. It has no pizzazz, and it doesn't state my id...
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