Besides the revisions listed in the paragraph, what else can Deepak do to strengthen his paper? He should try to keep all of his sentences the same length. He should use more than one technique to integrate his evidence. He should make sure he has a transition for every sentence in the paper. He should avoid extended definitions that provide too much information.

faulty parallelism is a construction in which two or more parts of a sentence are equivalent in meaning but not grammatically similar in form.

the correct version of this faulty parallelism in the sentence is:

the hikers knew that the hike was six miles, that it usually required the entire day, and it would not be wise to start after 10: 00 a.m.

the problem is the last sentence, the first two have a basic subject+verb+object structure.

so, to give a proper balance to the structure, or better said, to give a parallel structure, we must write a basic s+v+o structure in all three sentences:

the hikers knew that the hike was six miles, that it usually required the entire day, and it would not be wise to start after 10: 00 a.m.