REVISION ASSIGNMENT: rewrite the first paragraph with two ideas in mind. 1) Make sure all the sentences are complete with a subject and predicate. 2) Give me a Thesis Statement that gets closer to the big idea you wanted to express in this essay rather than simply a detail from the story. heres the paragraph below

One balmy late summer night, my amazing mother and father surprised me with flight tickets to ancient Greece..their homeland. A country I never thought i’d be lucky enough to visit especially at such a young age. I jumped up and down in excitement, unsure of how to thank my lovely parents. I knew I had to start packing right away because our trip was just a few days away. Comes around the day of our flight, my family and I are all ready to hop on this super long flight and get to beautiful Greece. Twelve hours on a flight was super exhausting but the moment we touched down, we completely forgot all of our tiredness. As we exited the airport I instantly felt a fresh breeze of air sway past my face. There were breathtaking flowers every way you turned your head.