[ Answer ]
- Remain Calm
- Give the misbehaving student a chance to respond
- Listen more than talk
- Do not take sides
- Avoid calling students "good" or "bad"
- Do not run to an adult right away
- View the situation from the other kids point of view
[ Explanation ]
When dealing with a kid at school, it can get very tense. It doesn't matter if you are the student, or just another kid who encountered a tricky situation. The same rules apply. Let's start with looking over some tips and pointers.
If you are a kid, and you are "facing" another kid in a fight, remain calm. This is very important when dealing with another aggressor. Chances are, the other kid is just as mad as you are, but we can't control him. You can only control you. Remain calm and talk things out before getting an adult. If you run off and get an adult right away, he might get madder and feel like he has not been heard. Do not hype up and get mad right away. Chances are, the situation was misread and there was a misunderstanding. You must control your temper, or you are just as big of a deal as they are.
Make sure to listen to the opposing side. If you want someone to listen to you, listen to them. Use words and phrases such as "So what I hear you saying is this ." Also use "I'm sorry, I don't understand where you are coming from." If you are a kid, this can be very hard. Most of the time we want to talk and talk without hearing a word the other person is saying. In order to prevent a fight, we need to listen and understand. Not everything is about us. We need to give them a chance to talk, just like we want one.
If you are an adult trying to calm down a fight, then make sure you are not taking sides. One student might feel like he needs someone to talk to, and if you disagree with him and take sides with the opposer, he might get confused and/or more upset. Listen to both sides of the story, then go with the logical answer, not with the side you agree with most.
Getting out of a fight can be a very tricky situation. We have all encountered these types of things, and sometimes never gotten out of them. It may be hard at first, or even for a long time, but with the right techniques and understanding, we can always figure them out.
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